Along with other things, wisdom is something that we acquire as we age. Always learning what is right and wrong, what is good and bad, etc. We add these to the other things we pick up with age. Among these are weight, hair in places that it should not be, bad knees and a plethora of other gifts that nature bestows upon us.
One thing that I have learned that is important is that we need to make sure that our relationships are in good standing. It is important that we take the extra steps to make sure that we are on good or civil terms with those that mean the most in our lives.
Recently I had a co-worker pass away. While I would not call us the best of friends, I would say we were on good terms. I worked with him on an almost daily basis, as part of my job, and I knew that he had issues in his life.
The last time I spoke with him, we had there was a little friction, and while we did not hang up angry, I knew there was tension. It was a couple months later that he passed away. I had never gotten the chance to speak to this person again.
In 1991, when my father passed away, there was much the same situation, except in this case I was encouraged not to tell my father all the demons that I had built up about his and my relationship. And when he died, there was all these things that I never had a chance to tell him.
These are things that we carry with us. The things not said, the resolutions not made, the fences not mended. You never know when it will be too late to do something that could make a difference. Maybe my father was waiting for me to open up and tell him how I felt, so that he too could have that final bit of closure. Maybe my coworker would have been a little bit happier if I was able to tell him that what I said was nothing personal, and to take it with a grain of salt.
The problem is that now we will never know.
We need to make sure that we part our friends and acquaintances on good or civil terms. Never walk away angry or mad. You never know when the last words or actions you share with a person are truly going to be the LAST ones. There is no way to predict the event that might cause you or your friends to no longer be there for one another.
I make it a point to never walk away from my wife angry. We have our arguments, and some of them can be pretty interesting, but we always make up.
So… Next time you walk away from your friends, wife, husband, etc… ask yourself one important question. Do I want those to be the last words that they remember me by, or are those the last words I want to have said to that person?
Most of us will live good, long and healthy lives… and for some, this is not a question you need to ask yourself, but sometimes we say things that we regret… that is what we should watch out for. Nothing is worse than to tell a person something hurtful, then something happens and you never have the chance to take it back.