We can all think of them… our first (enter subject here.)

Obviously, in order to keep this site family oriented, I am going to NOT share CERTAIN firsts in my life, and I would ask that you be so kind to do the same if you chose to join in on the fun.  This will be one of the few times I will invoke my right to edit your posts… if you post one that is great, but has a part that may push this site into the R rating, then I will remove or alter that one part with a note to the reader that I did so.

My first “first” that stand out the most is, of course, my first kiss (that was not under duress).  I am going to go out on a limb and embarrass the lady who gave me my kiss by telling you her name is Tonya Buck, or at least it was back then, she has long since married and had kids.  The kiss was in 1981 when I was 13 and my hormones were already screwed up.  We were at the dining room table and she was over for dinner.  My mom said something that embarrassed me and Tonya laughed at me and leaned over and kissed my on the cheek next to my lips.  To this day I cannot recall such a feeling.  I was dizzy, sweating, could not speak and my hands were shaking.  Looking back on it now, there was never another feeling like that again.

I think that of all our firsts… our first kiss it the most potent of all the experiences.  It is the catalyst that starts you into understanding, for a boy, what women are all about.  You learn right then and there that they will always have a certain level on control over you.

The second important “first” in my life, chronologically, is my wife, Naty.  That moment when we were sitting in the little restaurant in Solvang and I looked at her and like a flash, I no longer saw her as just a girlfriend.  I saw the woman that I loved and knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with, and with that same giddy, heart-thumping joy that I felt with the first kiss, I remember taking Naty’s hand and telling her I loved her.  I had uttered it a few times in passing before, but this time I knew I meant it will all my heart and soul.  The beautiful thing about it is that I still do today.

Other, less important “firsts” I can think of:

  • The first time I got in a fight.  November 1986 – Got my ass kicked and was also the first time I tasted my own blood, my first black eye and the first time I remember pure visceral rage.
  • September 1986 – First time I remember that I swam.  Drill Instructor pushed me into the pool with my pack and rifle.  I do not remember the swimming part, but I remember climbing out of the pool sputtering and coughing.
  • The first time I thought I was going to die…  When I was learning how to climb and the rope I was using broke free and I slid thirty feet before the guy teaching me was able to stop me.  That was also my first talk with G-d, whomever I thought they might be.  😉
  • The first time I got kicked in the balls.  It was in 1976 on the playground at Plantation School in Bakersfield, Ca.  I cannot remember his name, but I remember his brother was named Lee.  Grrr…
  • My first “Crush”…  Jamie Maxwell.  We were in Second grade together.
  • The first time I realized I was smarter, in certain things, than my mother *sometime in 1980*…  The only reason that stands out is because I tried to prove in…  Parents do not like it when their twelve-year-old tried to make them look dumb.  🙂
  • The first (and last) time I told my mom to go F*** herself, when I was 16.  My jaw still hurts from that one.
  • The first time I felt true loss… when My Great Grandmother died in 1976.  I sat in the living room closet for hours.
  • The first girl I acted like an idiot to try and impress, that would be Christy, in… Grade school, Junior High and High School.  What can I say… hormones were not good to me.
  • The first true friend I ever made, Grant.  I called him “Laughing Boy” during Freshman lunch in 1982, he punched me in the chest and knocked the wind out of me.  Been friends ever since. Go figure.
  • The first time I realized how short life can be… February 27, 1991.  My Father Died at the age of 53, not a day goes be that I do not think of him.
  • The first time I realized that I turned out a lot better than many others I went to school with expected me to… July 2006… 20th South High School reunion.

There is no order of importance to the bulleted list above… they are things that I think of as being events in my life that made me who I am today.  We are all products of those events that shape and guide us.  The “Firsts” are the most important, though.  They happen to you and you learn through them.  Sometimes good things, sometimes bad things.  But they are the mosaic that makes us who we are.

I would like to encourage you, the readers, to share your firsts with me and the world.  Be as detailed or clandestine as you want.

If I have included your name in here and you wish for me to remove it.  Just say the word and I will.  If you see your name here and want to say hi… by all means, do so.